Vacation from the Wedding - part 1

Our good friends Dani and Jer got married over the weekend in at the beautiful Darlington House in La Jolla San Diego. It was the best wedding I've been to. I had a great time and Mr. Joey even danced!!

The funny thing about attending someone's wedding while you planning your own, is that your mind races with every new and interesting detail you see. First, the ceremony. They were married by a friend and had a non-religious ceremony. They also broke the ceremony up into sections:

Welcome and Meaning of Marriage

Reading 1

Vows and Exchange of Rings

Reading 2

Sand Ceremony

Reading 3

Closing Words and Intrduction of New Couple

I really like the flow of the wedding. It looked like it would be long, but it wasn't, or it didn't feel that way. They did something interesting called the Sand Ceremony. Each person had a container of sand representing their individual life and together they poured them into a new container symbolizing the grains of ther lives coming together. I thought it was a great personal touch.

image: Leslie Spero

The readings were also great too. The first was from the movie, When Harry Met Sally, and the second was the poem Hug-O-War by Shel Silverstien and the third was an excerpt from the The Velveteen Rabbit.

I SO want to do something similar but it isn't really permitted in the ceremony. Oh, well…

The silver lining in all this is that watching Dani and Jer share their vows made Mr. Joey think about what it's going to be like for us. Mr. Joey was hesitant about having a Catholic blessing but agreed to it. After our last meeting with the officiant, he officially checked out of the ceremony planning. All the rules and regulations and limited flexibility in the ceremony was too much for him. I set about collecting readings and gospels for him to look at but he ultimately said whatever I wanted was fine. I wasn't happy with the answer but I was OK with it. Then something happened to Mr. Joey during the ceremony and suddenly he had all sorts of ideas.

For Example:

Doing the first and second readings in Sinhalese (Sri-Lankan Language) and Tagalog (the Filipino language my family speaks) with English translations in the program. He said he thought it would be something nice for my parents, particularly my Dad. Seriously? I almost started to cry. Mr. Joey isn't really the sentimental type so this was a big gesture.

Adding a third reading. Something we both love. I really love Mrs. Kitten's idea about using, Oh, the Places You Will Go by Dr. Seuss. It could work. The readings we're thinking about from the bible are super short. Maybe if we did an excerpt, we could fit something else in.

The bride's processional. He said that if I didn't mind, he wanted to come up with something special that would be a surprise. Again, Seriously? Are you sure you're Mr. Joey?

Did you FI suddenly get interested in an aspect of the planning that he previously ignored? What made him do so?

If We Had to Do It Again - Part 2

Two words -- Salk Institute.





I know I'm trying to be frugal with our wedding budget and save for the construction of our house but I would give my right leg, left arm and donate all my healthy cells to the institute to get married here.

Here a little background: Jonas Salk invented the polio vaccine (amazing) and purposely did not patent it so it could be available to everyone (double amazing). Because of his talent and forward thinking, he was given A LOT of money to build a research institute. Because he's so smart, he headed west to the paradise that is now La Jolla, California to find somewhere that would inspire artists and scientist alike. He teamed up with the amazing architect Louis Kahn and together they created the place of my wedding dreams (and haven for biological studies).

Mr. Joey is a architecture nerd. All his friends from college are architects or came from families of architects. I think he even did his master's thesis on the effect building architecture has on high school learning. See -- architecture nerd:) Anywho, when we started making plans for San Diego, Mr. Joey asked if we could go on a tour of the Salk Institute. I thought we were going to learn more about polio, so I of course was in.

Oh, there was little about polio and that's ok. The tour was about the architecture and vision of Kahn and Salk. Stunning. Absolutely stunning. Seriously, I would have considered a destination wedding to San Diego just to get married here. Sounds crazy but I could see the lines of my dress in the architecture of the buildings.

Alas, were not getting married here but someone could. The tour guide said that they do host weddings on the weekends. I have no idea what it costs, but it can't be cheap. I did find out that visiting the grounds and the cafeteria is free and open to the public. If you are in the area and need somewhere to inspire you, I can think of no better place. If you are an area bride, I have two more words for you -- engagement shoot. Think about it. I would:)

Mr. Joey soaking in a few rays and a lot of inspiration.

Wouldn't you love to say your vows and have this in the background?

Perfect place for the reception. Just below the perfect place for the ceremony.

How about sharing a kiss down one of these halls or landings? Sounds like a nice engagement picture to me.

If I Had to Do It Over Again - Part 1

Men Can Have Showers Too!

Our friend Paul just got married a few weekends ago. To celebrate his upcoming nuptials, his fellow teachers threw him a Man Shower. Yup. A shower for guys. There weren't any gifts off the registry or cute little favors but there were adults in overalls. Paul an avid gardener and lovingly refers to his 3x8 foot garden as his "farm" so his co-workers threw his a farm party. They dressed up in overall and straw hats, and bought him "farm" stuff ie seeds, rakes, shovels.

When Mr. Joey hears the words bridal shower, he cringes. Something about it want to make him run for the hills. I'm 99.99% certain we won't be having a co-ed shower. I think that's fine. But the question is, will Mr. Joey get a Man Shower? He'd say he doesn't want one (too embarrassing) but I think it would be funny. He works with this awesome teacher Jen who loves to make Mr. Joey feel uncomfortable in a comfortable way. When ever he looks a little frustrated, she always asks Mr. Joey to hug it out. He hates hugging people (besides me and relatives). She always asks the sweatiest teenager in school to stand next to him during school masses so they will inevitably have to hold hands (he hates holding hands - germs).

So of course when I thought about Mr. Joey and the Man Shower, I immediately thought of Jen. Sounds like she might be putting something together. In the end, if it isn't girlie shower, he'd love it. How do you think your groom would feel about a man shower? Anyone's husband or FI had one?

OVERLOAD!

Mr. Joey and I are about to bust. Not in a good way, not in a bad way and not in a financial way (yet). It's been wedding, wedding, house, wedding, house, house, house nonstop for the last 3 weeks. And not just our wedding but everyone else's too. Mr Joey went to a friend's wedding 2 weekends ago and we're headed to a wedding in San Diego this weekend. Of course you know that a wedding isn't just a ceremony and reception, but all the dinners and parties that go along with it. Like I said; wedding, wedding, house, wedding, house, house, house.

Take for example Saturday. We started the day well; a nice long lie in followed by a yummy breakfast prepared by Mr. Joey. As soon as the last bite was in my mouth, my phone rang. It was my Dad asking us to meet him at Lowe's in an hour to look at fences. We know it's early for fences but there were some he got an awesome deal on for another project that he wanted us to look at. If he bought all the fencing for both projects, he could save everyone a huge chunk of change.

After Lowe's, we followed my Dad to the cabinet and counter place. We've been going back and forth about cabinets and counters for weeks. There's a style we're after that we saw at Ikea we'd like to replicate. My Dad suggested that we not buy from Ikea and spend a little more for solid wood cabinets. He said it would last much longer. We agreed but finding the same style elsewhere has been hard. So after weeks of back and forth, we finally ended up with what we want. Check it out. Just imagine it with white counters and cork floors! The layout will be different but the style the same.

After finalizing the cabinets and counters, we headed to a great local wine store to pick up a bottle for dinner. While we were there, we perused the their selection for possible wedding wines. We ended up there longer than we planned. We got to talking with one of their staff about how much wine we should serve. She said that taking into consideration the time of day, the time of year and the number of drinkers, we should probably be buying 2 cases of red and 2 cases of white. She also told us that we can get 5% off each case we buy and we could return unused wine. Good to know.

After a nice walk around our future neighborhood, we headed home so Mr. Joey could sneak in a quick power nap. He had a little headache. While he slept, I tallied up the recent RSVPs and declines, answered emails from various vendors, completed my portion of the FOCCUS test and took an inventory of the fabric and vases we have for the wedding.

Later in the evening we joined friends where the main topic of conversation was the wedding Mr. Joey just attended.

This week Mr. Joey has to take his portion of the FOCCUS test, get pictures taken and his passport renewal application off and we're meeting with our financial planner (finally). I've also been hunting for a new rehearsal dinner location.

Thankfully we're headed to San Diego this week -- for a wedding. Actually, I'm looking forward to San Diego. Sun! Give me Sun! We managed to fit in a few extra days there and are looking forward to being away from our computers (leaving them at home) and not going near a Lowe's for a few days.

I think this break comes at the perfect time. As we near the 3 month mark for the wedding and ground breaking for the house (2 weeks!!!!), we know all the planning will get crazier.

Did you take a break from wedding planning for a few days?

Brown Dress Plan: Week 4 and Getting Kicked off the Wagon

Week 4 of the brown dress plan didn't go as I had hoped. I did manage to get in about an hour of lifting and abs, and almost 3 hours of vigorous walking but the spin classes did not happen. I'd like to say I was lazy and enjoyed some other activity in place of working out, but that would be a lie. I didn't fall off the wagon; I got kicked off...hard. What kicked me? This:

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Ah, sinus headaches! I love Spring and the sun but I could do without the sinus headaches. I never had them until about 2 years ago. Now when I get them, I get them. My eyeballs feel like they are going to throb right out of their sockets, my head feels like it's being hit by a hammer, and the bridge of my nose feels like a full grown elephant is standing on it. Sometimes my teeth hurt! They are the worse. I got a sinus headache 4 days last week. Week 5 isn't looking so hot either since I spent all of Monday night in bed with another one.

I know I didn't do everything I wanted to do last week (fitness or otherwise) but I'm not too worried about getting back on the horse. I definitely think it helps that this is a lifestyle change as oppose to losing weight by a certain date. I think there's less pressure when you miss a week. And since I'm going to continue with the plan forever (I hope), I know there will always be a week here and there where work or health gets in the way. I think the key is motivation.

I'm definitely seeing some change in my body. I've lost weight around my ribs (below my bra). My calves are a little slimmer and I put on a pair of jeans over the weekend that I haven't worn in 2 years! They were very snug, but they were on me.

I also read this morning that weight loss can lower the prevalence of headaches. In addition to sinus headaches, I get some wicked migraines. There's sweating, head pounding and a few visits to the toilet bowl (sorry tmi). While I do still get the occasional migraine, I have noticed I don't get them as often. I'll woot! woot! to that.

In addition to looking thinner, what kinds of benefits have you seen and/or felt when you changed your diet or started working out more?

Brown Dress Plan
Brown Dress Plan: Week 1
Brown Dress Plan: Weeks 2 & 3

Cooking Up the Registry

We're still a little worried about our registry. We seem to take more off it than put on it and it seems that over 60% of what we managed to put on it costs less that $15. Hmm…we don't want to register for the sake of registering but we want to give guests options. Our solution? Books. Well, more specifically, cookbooks.

Mr. Joey and I love food. I'm not sure we would call ourselves foodies, but maybe the rung below that. We have a little collection of cookbooks now, mostly ones we've been given as gifts.

So now we're trying to add to our cookbook collection. We're looking at titles we know we'll actually use now and in the future. We're also looking for cookbooks Mr. Joey would be comfortable using. He responsible for 3 dinners a week and lately they've been the same things every week. He get intimidated by a long list of ingredients and the use of more than one pot.

I'm looking for 2 types of cookbooks. One with recipes I can prepare fairly quickly and ones with lovely options for our big Sunday dinners. We decided a few months ago to end (or start) the week with a big, interesting meal that may take several hours to prepare. We've been doing various roasts but I'd love to move beyond that. I'm also looking cookbooks on the healthier side (sorry Paula Deen).

I've been surfing Amazon for possible registry additions and then putting cookbook contenders on hold at the library. This way we can test drive the cookbook. If there is more than 5 or 6 recipes we'd prepare, then the cookbook becomes a real contender. I've also been checking out what's on the shelves at friends' houses.

So far, here are some contenders we like (we're not registering for all of them :) )

These two books fit Mr. Joey's need for simple and my need for fast. I love Donna Hay's recipes. They are light and filling at the same time. The ingredients are easy to find but pack a lot of flavor.

We love Chinese but really only eat it when we go out. The only Chinese I currently make is Beef Broccoli. Her recipes are simple and so good. FMIL Joey suggested this title.


Both of these titles seem like they would be great additions to any library. Lots of dishes you can make as mains or sides.

Mr. Joey really liked this Cooking Light title. My only concern is that we get the magazine. It may be to repetitive.

I can make about 6 or 7 Filipino dishes from memory but I'd love to be able to make more. I love this book because of the pictures and stories. It also doubles as a coffee table book which is always a bonus.

all images

I like both these books because they are a little out of the ordinary for us. We actually made roasted pork belly from the Meat Cookbook for Christmas dinner. It was AMAZING.

Anything you think we should add - suggestions for good Thai, Mexican, South American and Middle Eastern cookbooks? I'm always hunting for Afghan cookbooks. What cookbooks do you have in your library that you can't live without?

Changing My Dress

Oh no, I haven't changed my mind about my dress. I'm still going with the fabulous short number by Liza Rietz, I've just asked her if a little change is possible.

I love the dress as is and would wear it as she designed it but for some reason, only recently did I realize that me and crew necklines? Not a flattering pair. I have wide boobs (yes, I said it) and a crew neckline highlights their wideness. I don't really know how to explain it better than that. I'm sure a push-up bra would help but I also know a scoop neck does wonders. So I emailed Liza and asked her if a small scoop neck was at all possible. Thankfully she said yes and proposed a change.

This is is her original design

And this is the change to the neckline

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I love it. I also love that now I can wear a necklace. Did you change the neckline to your dress so it would flatter your top half better? We're you happy with the result?